Ok..I admit...I screwed up last night. I got the times mixed up for the various halloween festivals and events that Bret and I had sceduled for the passed week. We ended up showing up just as the festival was closing last night. Standing there while they turn the lights off in the game rooms while your five year old dressed in a Venom costume cries quietly, isn't the best way a mother can spend Halloween. Luckily some nice people offered to share their candy and I couldn't even look them in the eye to thank them cause I was trying not to cry myself.
I hate disappointing my little boy.
I hate it more than this random toothache I've got going on.
I hate it more than the fruit flies that have invaded my kitchen.
I hate it more than when his dad's family has him and I have nothing to do.
I hate it more than the prospect of Obama being my brand spanking new presidon't of the united states in two days.
So I sit here alone, scouring my blog list for something that will make me laugh...and all I feel is guilt. I know I shouldn't beat myself up over it, but he's only little once. And now that his dad and I have parted ways, I only get to see him 26 weeks out of the year. Maybe even less than that now, if I get this job.
What will I do without little greasy handprints on my windows?
What will I do without morning cuddles?
What will I do when the only thing I have to feel guilty about is sleeping in more than I should?
They say it's not so bad, growing old, letting go of the children....but what if I only have one...and he doesn't give me grandbabies?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment